shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
