I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
