the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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