I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
