Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
