I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize