kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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