That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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