I wanna passion pit in your ass
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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