Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
