In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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