YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
