what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
