Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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