Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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