He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
