I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
