we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
