***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
