i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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