Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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