Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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