OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
