i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I enjoy the company of your penis
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
