addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
