I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
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