did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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