Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize