K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
