You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
