i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
we're so committed to being not committed
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
