FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Randomize
