We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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