i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
