did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Just pee around me
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize