the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
