He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Green mimosas i think yes
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
