Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
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