This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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