My brain says no but my pants say off.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
