When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
