Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
