so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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