But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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