Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
