My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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