susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
