There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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