question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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