How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
