their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I wish you could order shots online.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
