Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
